( KENOS ) COMMUNION.

[appeale]

come on, wake up.	you have to be careful.
don't make mistakes.	you know how quickly kindness can turn into violence.

( CODE BY WHAMBAM )

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[appeale]

[ there's a startled squawk out of Rudbeckia as he scoops her up, but she seems to be somewhat accustomed to getting manhandled like this: she doesn't struggle or jerk away, gone pliant and leaning into Gen with what must be either trust that he will support her or resignation to whatever happens. the bag is retrieved from the table without protest, and she clutches it to herself with both hands, careful of the objects inside. even if he dropped her, she would have to protect this above all else.

it doesn't sit well with her that Gen isn't asking anything. of course, it makes sense that he wouldn't – she's sure that he doesn't particularly care about her wellbeing, and he certainly has no reason to be curious. she only worries that it will be an annoyance. because she did lie to him, and she's inconvenienced him. people have hated her for far less. to be honest, it shouldn't really matter, but... even so. even so, hadn't she already realised it? however foolish it is of her to feel this way, it does matter to her. hasn't she already accepted that she's going to hold onto Gen for as long as she can until he kicks her off the ledge himself? even if it doesn't make sense, even if it's not for her survival, even if she is only ever clinging to his sleeve like a child.

somehow, she has to explain herself to him. not to be forgiven, but at least so that she doesn't come off as arrogant. the silence stretches out a long way before Ruby is finally able to draw a breath and speak— ]

... I don't know what it is either. I just get sick for a little while, once or twice a year... [ no more details of the nature of her illness are necessary; Gen wouldn't be interested, anyway. Ruby leans her head against his collarbone, her dark expression safely tucked away beneath his sight. ] But when Father called a doctor for me, they said there was nothing wrong.

[ she had been fortunate, in Britannia, to catch a "real" sickness at the same time as her chronic pain. that's the only reason the Omertas' doctor bothered to treat her, she has no doubt. the next time, it would not have been so kindly received. ]

So... I didn't want to be called a liar again...

[epiprocta]

[ He waits for a moment to make sure Ruby has a good hold on the jars before carefully adjusting his hold on her -- gripping tighter, but not too tight, shifting the way her weight is distributed across his arms. And then he starts heading in the direction of the closest cornerstone. His boots thump steadily off the pavement below them, one foot in front of the other. A good few moments pass in that fashion, with Gen silently trudging along, expression fixed in his usual frown with brow lowered and lips pursed, before he speaks up. ]

I don't know shit about medical stuff. [ Probably unsurprising. ] And I don't get sick often. [ Probably also unsurprising. ] So it's not like I'm gonna know enough to call you a liar if you just say you got a nosebleed 'cause you're sick.

[ He wouldn't have doubted her, in other words. ]

Don't just say whatever lie first comes to mind, dumbass.

[ It would be a stretch and a half to say he's comforting her in any way. That's not his intention, and it's probably not the result he gets, either. But it's just that it's always annoyed him when people just go acting like they know him and make completely incorrect assumptions. He doesn't know who the hell it is that Ruby's previous had such shit experiences with, but they're not him, so he'd rather not be treated like them.

... still. He does get it, does understand why Ruby did something so stupid. Which is why Gen 'mercifully' ends his reprimand of her there, giving a small sigh as he rounds a corner (no doubt startling some poor passerby who definitely wasn't expecting to suddenly be faced by an enormous, sour-faced teen carrying a delicate little girl in his arms). ]

Whatever. Just don't lie to me like that again. [ And now that she'll hopefully just give him a goddamn straight answer: ] So are you dying, or is this like a cold where you can just sleep it off?

[appeale]

[ ... ahh. this is why she can't let go of him easily. even without Rudbeckia explaining herself, Gen understands, at least to some extent. that calm acceptance is like a salve, cool and refreshing, where saccharine words of comfort would have only left the wound to fester. kindness, love, compassion – none of those things can be relied upon, and all of them run out sooner or later, leaving behind only resentment. if someone understands her, then she wouldn't ask for anything more.

getting this attached to someone that couldn't give a damn whether she lives or dies—she really is such a pathetic fool. ]

Somewhere in between? It normally lasts for about a week. [ the tension unwinds from Ruby's body, and she relaxes against Gen with a sigh. only her tight grip on the bag remains, whether that's from a fear of dropping it or the same sign of white-knuckled pain that Gen noticed earlier. ] It's not that bad... Mostly the symptoms are just nausea and some pain.

[ some, she says. the physical agony is the worst part, but she can't shake the certainty that she would only be dismissed for trying to explain the severity of it, to anyone. just a stupid little girl whining about something that probably doesn't even hurt that much. besides, she can bear with it alone, so it isn't necessary to discuss. ]

I never used to pass out or bleed – that only started recently, so I wasn't expecting it again. I really thought there wouldn't be any problem.