( KENOS ) COMMUNION.

[appeale]

come on, wake up.	you have to be careful.
don't make mistakes.	you know how quickly kindness can turn into violence.

( CODE BY WHAMBAM )

Comments

(frozen comment)

[appeale]

MENTAL ATMOSPHERE

There is a layer of static that blankets any communion with Rudbeckia—an all-encompassing anxiety, so much that it often muffles any other feeling to be found in her. You have the strange sense of holding something small and frail in your hands: a bird, or a rabbit, carefully keeping itself still even as you can feel its panicked heartbeat thrumming throughout its entire body. At times, you hear your own voice reverberate, but it comes back colder, sharper than you meant it to be.

ASPECT: Stargazer
COMPATIBLE WITH: Exalt, Advocate
REPELLED BY: Iconoclast

Post Iconoclast Event

[hauntedking]

[ Dimitri reaches out very tentatively and guarded. It's... hesitant, more than anything. A touch of sorrow. ]

May I speak to you? I'll understand if you would prefer not to.

[appeale]

[ her immediate reaction is to flinch from him – and then she seems to dig her heels in, keeping herself in place. the Communion space is frozen with fear, and yet Rudbeckia stands there, barefoot and ankle-deep in snow, shivering: not an act of defiance, but one of submission. ]

Of course, signore. I was hoping to speak with you, as well.

[ it is best to confess her sins at the beginning, rather than wait for the demand— ]

—I'm really, really sorry! I can't possibly apologise enough for my actions – I-I was weak and cowardly, and so I was easily influenced... I've committed a grave sin against you, and the others. It's my fault that Meridian lost the Oracle, so naturally I understand if you're angry with me... If there's any punishment that can make reparations for what I did, of course, I'll accept it!

[hauntedking]

[ Oh. Perhaps not quite the reaction he expected, but maybe he should have. There's a response that comes with a sense of surprise - and guilt. The fear makes him flinch. Is that what he's become? ]

...that isn't what I wanted to discuss. I... wanted to offer my own apology. I was not in my right mind and... turning to murder is an extreme and heartless reaction.

[ He's genuine enough, at least. ]

I do not wish to punish you. Simply... apologize.

BACKDATED TO LATE WARQU, PRE-BEACH.

[redsoil]

[ — the point where Communion violently begins is born from the sense of intimate connection developed between two individuals.

It is very obviously a burning, bright thing from Set, whose mind scatters into the corners of those he has forged some sort of companionship with — for duty, for responsibility, for fun, for solemn vow. What arrives is the briefest sense of rising disorientation, woven through with a burst of wrath and grief so white-hot that it might char flesh from bone within seconds, shot through with rapture and the whiplash of love. It rises like a dying, murderous sun ( like Meridian ) — stifling and acute and suffocating — only to be tempered within seconds, by the cool, crisp wash of the dark sea ( like Zenith ), tempered and soothed with all edges laid flat once more.

The Communion plunges into quiet and calm, like a great, purring beast, and ends as abruptly as it began. ]

[appeale]

?!

[ the wordless reaction this garners from Rudbeckia is akin to a startled animal – and it is very apparent that the only reason she doesn't figuratively bolt is because it's from Set. nothing about the feelings she receives seem as though they were intended for her, which means this was likely sent out through sheer reflex, an alarm sounding so loudly it echoes throughout Set's mind along the entwined threads of their Communion. ]

??????

[ her first response is simply a nudge, though she cannot smother the spike of anxiety, the way it hisses and screeches and seethes in the background noise of her existence. there is a thread of concern, too, thin but strong as steel; a fear of harm coming to Set, whether it is a feeling rooted in care or self-preservation. ]

Set, are you alright? You don't have to tell me anything, just, if you're okay...

[redsoil]

[ the furbies have set one another off i see ]

Ah.

[ It takes some time before Set is able to return to Ruby's mind and alight upon it. He carries with him the innate cool, crisp atmosphere of Zenith's night air, the faint scent of the Lady upon him — soothing Meridian's energetic poison, as if he's taken a dose of medicine to ward off the fever. With her, it is easy to follow the thread of her attentiveness back, as if slithering out of the labyrinth and into her cool embrace. ]

— we are uninjured, Ruby. Liem and I found something we sought, and. It was a lot to observe. I had so many questions and thoughts, all at once.

[ And like the desert sands, he had scattered to the vast corners of those he felt the greatest connection with, carried to them. ]

communion ; about a week after the exalt oracle fight

[epiprocta]

[ The Communion starts as things often do when Gen is involved -- roughly, abruptly, and unceremoniously. Ruby doesn't even get the basic courtesy of a warning. There's just the sensation of her attention being requested, like the sharp rap of knuckles at a door, followed immediately by the equivalent of the door being kicked down the instant she unlocks it. Gen barges in with all the good manners of a loan shark looking to collect what he's owed. ]

Where are you.

[ He's angry, she might note. Though -- not at her. That distinction is important. Gen's very presence across this psychic connection bristles with moody irritation and anxiety, but it seems to be aimless at the moment, merely coloring the air with an uneasy energy. Case in point: his manner of speaking is brusque and sharp, even moreso than usual, but there's no true vitriol or venom in his words.

Not that that caveat lessens how demanding he must come across when he deadpans, ]

You're gonna do me a favor. [ The way he just says this as a fact, instead of a request??? But whatever, she owes him one, anyway. Especially after her return to Meridian. Even if Gen can't exactly blame her for it, he still has no qualms about using that against her to extract some use out of her. ] Gonna give you something you gotta deliver for me. So where are you. I'm heading over.

[appeale]

[ there is a moment, when the Communion first connects, where Gen feels something: a sudden spike of pain, full-body agony like every inch of him is being stabbed with white-hot needles, muscles wound so tense they could snap, head swimming with nausea—only for a split second, and then it is gone, so brief that his senses barely have time to register what happened. Ruby shoves those sensations down with both hands as though she could separate from her own body. ]

Ah, of course! [ her own mental landscape remains gentle in the presence of his sharp edges, unquestioning and accepting of Gen much in the way of a submissive dog bowing its head. ] I owe you a lot, after all.

[ Minegishi Gen is such a strange figure to her. it made sense to affix herself to him when she was part of Zenith's ranks; someone that might hurt her could still be someone that might protect her, after all, so long as she behaved herself well. now that she has returned to Meridian, it seems more absurd than ever to count on any mercy from Gen, which makes him a threat without any value to offset it, but... here she is, holding onto that thread anyway. pleasantly surprised to hear from him at all after they had parted ways.

though she does wish it hadn't been now, of all times. ugh, this wretched illness of hers. and just what is he so pissed off about, anyway... ]

I'll meet you, um... Here? [ she shows him an image of a café in Springstar, with a broad enough view to put it in the context of its surroundings. ] —Or I could come to Highstorm, if you'd prefer?

[epiprocta]

[ It might have been brief, but there was definitely something there -- a sympathetic twinge of something sharp enough to cut even through the lingering exhaustion and aches of what he'd endured during the fight for the Oracle. Something that he knows he sure as hell didn't just hallucinate. It had been too lacking in malice or intent to be an active attack from Ruby (as if she could even manage such a thing), though. Which means ... ]

...

[ There's a moment of silence on Gen's end, and Ruby might feel her skin prickling ever so slightly, the way one feels a dubious stare boring into their skin. But after a moment, there's a quiet huff. Gen's anger lessens just a fraction -- not out of any kindness or mercy, but simply because the brief distraction's stoppered the momentum of his irritation -- and the edges of his words are faintly blunted when he speaks again. ]

Fine. I'm heading over. [ Of course, he doesn't even wait for a response before just cutting the connection. Rude!

At least he moves fast, motivated by irritation, anxiety, and the desire to get this entire matter over and done with. By the time Ruby shows up to the cafe, Gen is already there, seated at one of the little tables outside nursing a cup of black coffee. (Because of course that's his drink of choice.) On the table next to his cup sits a fabric sack containing ... something. No doubt the delivery he means for Ruby to make. ]

a memory—

[kenosnpcs]

[ Very suddenly, there’s a sense of Communion touching your character’s mind. However, it’s as if they connect with the mind of a shared Aspect, as they’re not able to block out the brief, but sharp memory that comes to them. ]

With shaky hands, a new Shard-Bearer accepts a Shard from Yima. Their husband was reduced to this, something so small and fragile, and in that moment, they know that they’ll stop at nothing to protect it and bring him back.

[ ooc note — Just to avoid OOC confusion/misinterpretation, the details included in this memory are random and are not necessarily interconnected or plot meaningful beyond a surface level. However, your character is free to interpret this random memory however they’d like! This event will also be touched on somewhat during today’s NPC Communion Post. ]

action

[gravings]

[ Gray has always been self-conscious about the difference in status — or former status — between herself and Rudbeckia. Rudbeckia has never been condescending toward her, or rude, or otherwise acted like she and Gray were worthy of different things... but it's one of those things that sit in the back of Gray's mind, like noting that cats are different from dogs.

So she's a bit surprised when she's notified that Rudbeckia will be helping out at Dokja's book cafe, Ugly Squid. She won't make any assumptions, though; having a fancier background doesn't equate to incompetence. On the contrary, being especially rich might require one to be hypercompetent to protect those riches... and an ability to navigate the social politics of aristocracy might translate well to navigating the minefield that can be customer service.

In any case, working at the Ugly Squid isn't actually that serious. If Gray has managed to work here without making a mockery of the place, then surely anyone can.

It's a slow spot in the day, late enough that the demand for coffee is sporadic. Gray stands with Rudbeckia at the coffee counter, thinking about where to start. It's rare that she's put in the position to train other people. ]

Miss Rudbeckia, do you drink much coffee?

[appeale]

[ the more time she spends with Gray, the more Rudbeckia is reminded of Endymion, the young squire that had often been assigned to guard her in Britannia. it's one of the only positive associations she's ever drawn in Kenos, and the realisation gives her more stable footing in their interactions almost immediately. she can accept Gray's kindness because it is uncomplicated, like a child's; she can rely on her for protection the same way one might a dog. they don't need to become closer than that. no, she doesn't want to become closer.

there is a reason, after all, that Ruby is only capable of befriending children and beasts: they will never actually come to know her. ]

No, it didn't exist yet in Romagna, so I'm not very familiar with it. But I've started drinking it here in Kenos, and I like it!

[ although Ruby has never worked a day in her life – in any life – she is well-versed in the art of people-pleasing. it's been an easy adaptation period. when there are customers, she serves them as closely as a maid. when her hands are empty, she cleans. learning the specifics of the little shop has taken more time than anything else, and even that is fairly simple, just as Dokja had assured her.

and sometimes, she gets coffee. she hadn't had coffee since her life in Madrid, back when she lived on it the same as any other young adult. ]

What about you, Gray?

[gravings]

[ Coffee didn't exist yet?? Those words quietly blow Gray's mind. The only thing that might hit her harder would be if Ruby said that tea didn't exist either.

(The specific wording, "didn't exist yet," strikes Gray as a little odd, but she thinks nothing else of it.) ]

Tea was more popular in London. I only drink enough coffee to be sure I'm making it right.

[ Coffee feels more adult to her. Even if she's on the verge of being able to call herself an adult, enjoying coffee is one of those hurdles she feels no rush to leap. ]

There are a lot of different ways to make coffee though, so I've ended up having to drink a lot. Ah, I have a guide here.

[ She produces a handy dandy list for Ruby's viewing pleasure. ]

right after she slams the door in communion 8)

[redsoil]

[ The impression of Set being at the closed boundary of her mind is that of a hot breeze, a strong hand on the handle of a door — knowing it is locked, but waiting for the resident to choose to let him in, or not.

And the thing is, if he cannot get to her in his mind, he will simply find her as a person. Whole and physical and real, almost distracting her with Communion as he attempts to find her real shape ( in the shrine? her haven? ) and be there, too. Undeniable and determined.

In both his mind and reality, he says the same thing at the same time: ] I spoke with her, to reinforce the fact of our relationship. I will be explaining it to all of Meridian, then Zenith — once I am able to phrase it in a way that does not immediately make you a target. Neither Faction has any claim to you. Just me.

[appeale]

[ at first, Rudbeckia shies from his searching, shame and humiliation bleeding out underneath the gap in the closed door. she didn't want to make Set do this. it's not that she thought he would reject her, because he's proven enough that this is something he's willing to stand by her over. it's not that that he would choose Hayame over her, either – to Set, there are no such "choices" he has to make. but she didn't want to cause problems. even if Hayame hadn't restrained herself at the amusement park, even if she had beaten Ruby, she was never going to say a word to Set. how dare she create friction in a relationship that is infinitely more valuable to Set than her own? she'll be seen as a jealous woman, or a nuisance, too clingy and too needy, more trouble than she's worth.

but he comes to her in person. curled up on the floor of the shrine like a discarded doll – at the sight of him, the inescapable truth of his promise, life suddenly returns to her. her eyes well with tears, and she scrambles up off the floor to throw herself at Set instead, clinging to him with a desperate strength, the way she had in the roots beneath the Tree when he had made her this promise for the first time. ]

I hate them. [ it's not the screaming from the earlier Communion. her voice is small and tremulous, and her body trembles along with it. ] All of them. I really, really... [ hic! ] What did I ever do? I know I'm a burden, why does that mean I have to lay down and die? No matter what I did, they would have hated me eventually for not being good enough! So I was fine with living like a corpse, but now I'm the one to blame because other people might hurt me?! It's not my fault...!

[redsoil]

It is not your fault.

[ ( How he wished, once, that someone would have said those words to him. )

Rudbeckia lunges into his arms, and as he had below the Tree, he lifts her into them and draws her feet from the ground below. Strong of arm and sheltering of limb, as he tucks his face into the crook of her neck and breathes in the scent of her hair. ]

You were asked to survive impossible situations again, and again. The world has set you up for failure and pain, but that ends with me. Meridian, Zenith, your past — I will not leave you to be devoured by any of it. You must live. You have the right to live how you need to, until the day you can live how you want to, my Ruby.

[ Even if that day never comes, it will not change them. ]

after the hayame happenings

[leicesters]

[Claude's not fond of Communion at the best of times, but he's most reluctant of all to use it to commune with his fellow Stargazers. Those negative emotions he goes to pains to hide -- his cold anger at Set, his revulsion toward Voryn -- are all but impossible to hide, and he in turn is open to all manner of thoughts, feelings, impressions, that might leak over from the others unimpeded.

Ruby, however, is someone he can't ignore. He should have intervened in Hayame speaking with her before, but as it stands, he's a little too late. Even so, he can't let it go unaddressed.

So he stands on the edge of her Communion, not invited and not wanting to intrude even with their shared Aspect, to say his part:]

Rudbeckia? I'm... sorry for how she spoke to you.

[appeale]

[ it's only because he's a Stargazer that the impression Claude gets is something black and cold. from across the distance he allows, there is an overlapping image that can exist in the Communion space: not Ruby by herself, but clutched in Set's warm embrace and, at the same time, clinging to Gen's dark presence. over Set's shoulder, from where she hides her face against Gen's side—

she is glaring at him. it's the wary gaze of a wounded animal. ]

It's fine. It isn't the first time. I'm sure it won't be the last.

[ and it does seem to be "fine," in the sense that she isn't disappointed. Claude can feel, in that darkness, that she never expected anyone to speak up in her defence in the first place. so there's nobody to blame. ]

It's my fault. I should have just kept my mouth shut. I'm sorry I caused trouble.

late takiltu ; communion

[epiprocta]

[ How long has it been since they all awoke at that wretched tree? Two days, maybe three? Time doesn't really have any meaning anyway, not with the way Gen's been aimlessly sleeping the hours away, drifting between nightmares (awful but familiar), coherency (awful and unwelcome) and some unpleasant middle ground (awful all around). But at some point, trying to sleep any more just rewards him with a throbbing headache and dizziness, and so he needs to do something, no matter how much he doesn't want to.

And so one afternoon finds Ruby receiving a nudge across Communion. It's more listless and weary than Gen's usual mental signature across Communion, like he simply can't muster the energy for his usual, prickly facade. The equivalent of a hand smacking open-palmed against her door, just once, in a drained demand for her attention.

And the moment she answers, Gen's words come through, hoarse and curt: ]

Where are you.

[appeale]

[ Rudbeckia's memories from waking are blessedly vague, a kaleidoscopic blur vibrant fears and despair so deep she has yet to surface from it even now. she remembers stumbling from her cocoon like a feral, undead thing; retching, as though she could empty out the horror filling her to the brim; screaming until her voice gave out; collapsing into a sobbing heap and clawing at the dirt, so desperate for an outlet that she could only lash out mindlessly, animalistic. she remembers, too, that there were others—but even seeing Gen there in the roots wasn't enough to pull her out of the mire that had buried her mind.

days later, though the body she's in is the same that she came to possess the last time she died, there is a lingering feeling of rejection that she can't shake. she feels like she doesn't quite fit in it, like she's merely a shade struggling to puppet this body from outside of it. she doesn't—want to be here. she wants to live, she always wants to live, but coming back just to be beaten and mocked and scorned and shoved face-down to the ground so that others can step over her, again and again and again and—

there is something wrong with the projected image of Ruby when she meets Gen in that shared space, near-ghostly and flickering, appearing as though there is an outline of her misaligned with the rest of her shape. and then the visual slips away too, smothered in a dark veil and reduced to sensations alone over their connection. ]

Set's shrine. [ her voice is small and exhausted past any words, though she manages to scrape together some pale imitation of wryness: ] I'm not really welcome in Springstar.

late takiltu

[hauntedking]

[ Ruby recieves a small parcel; it contains some mixed sweets and baked goods and a scarf or shawl, apparently chosen from a store somewhere. The lightness of it would seem to indicate Springstar, considering the weather. There's also a note: ]

I hope you are well, following the Oracle, and that this small token of my regard will help make this part o the year a little more cheerful.

-Dimitri Blaiddyd

[appeale]

[ the Communion comes a few days after the gift is received, and Ruby's mind is almost unfamiliar; there is no warmth, no bright feeling that lifts the heart, no effort made at all to be—palatable. her presence isn't hostile in any way, but it is cold and dark and empty, quiet in the way of a tragedy's aftermath. the stillness of a funeral, or a sudden loss, or a home burned to the ground.

she speaks softly, as though there were nothing out of the ordinary: ]

Thank you for the gift, Dimitri. I'll be sure to wear it often.

mid-pelu

[cyfaredd]

[ Howl isn't one for religion Definitely not organized religion. But the more involved he gets in the Emporio District and the merchants and capitalists who control it, the more they seem to push him towards attending a service every once in a while. Something about the mission, about Meridian, about the importance of Bearers to show devotion to the cause... It's all still a bunch of nonsense to Howl, despite all that's happened since he arrived, so when he does finally give in, it's begrudging.

Unsurprisingly, it's just as silly as he feared. Howl keeps himself entertained by imagining what the other people around him might be thinking about his outfit, his hair, the promotions and advertisements he's done recently for the most popular brands in Skysong. He stares at the woman sitting in front of him, her curly beehive hairdo twisted up and around so oddly that it resembles a bird's nest. He gazes at the beautiful man delivering the sermon and speaking to the audience, using a little bit of subtle persuasive magic to keep him from focusing any of his attention on the golden-haired wizard. And, finally, his attention settles on the beautiful young woman, standing off to the side like a proper little trophy, as she watches her "husband."

She's an odd one. But, maybe, odd in a way Howl can understand. At the close of the proceedings, Howl stands and swiftly walks over to her, his long coat and trailing sleeves swaying slightly with his smooth steps. He looks remarkably handsome and beautiful today, his marble-like green eyes glittering as he flashes his best smile at her. ]

Miss Rudbeckia, wasn't it? [ They had only spoken over Communion before, but Howl knows this is her. Not just from her relationship with Set, but... the vibe she's giving off. ] If I may reintroduce myself and make your formal acquaintance, [ holding out his hand, ] I am the Wizard Howl. Please, allow me to speak with you a moment?

[appeale]

[ the performance that Rudbeckia used to put on in front of others is now reserved only for these meaningless crowds of NPCs; she no longer plays a role for the sake of her own pathetic survival, only for the advantage of the man she loves. so when it's a Shard-Bearer who approaches her, there's no need to keep up appearances. where she once would have greeted Howl with warmth or anxious fluttering – whatever might please him – here her only reaction is a slow blink and a nonchalant: ]

Sure, if you want. [ despite their shared Meridian alignment, she seems to regard Howl with the same wary disdain one would expect her to show a Zenite. and yet, she doesn't hesitate to place her hand in his. ] Is it to complain about my husband? Or have I committed some offence?

[ she can't really think of any other reason someone would want to speak with her. ]